Gloss and Primer
This site is now over five years old, with over 1,000 posts. Just as with Lost or the Jim Rome Show, it's difficult for new folks get on board. There's no dude intoning "Previously on The Mid-Majority" before every post. That's why we've put together this page, so that you can get up to speed on all the in-jokes.
America's Most Boring Interstate - The long stretch of Interstate 70 from Salina, Kansas to Denver, Colorado. Nominee of reader Trae, and winner of our February 2009 contest.
American-Style Football - Bizarre combination of fake violence and boardroom procedurals; worst game ever invented. Designed specifically for confused, maladjusted, passive-aggressive sissies.
Arnone, Jasper Joe - Public address announcer for Central Connecticut State, and the finest at his job in all of Hoops Nation. Interview subject during Season 4. The Best.
ARRRGH - Expression of pain and anguish, often heard in March when a team below the Red Line comes close to a landmark upset but falls just short at the end. Always spelled with three R's. Subject of a worst-ARRRGH contest in December 2007, won by Dr. Pierce Greenberg with a story about UNC Wilmington 2003.
Atlantic 14 - Red Line-straddling league full of wonderful overachieving programs and proud fans. Financial issues limit teams' ability to retain salaried personnel. Includes 40 percent more teams than listed; truth in advertising is very important. Formerly known as the Atlantic 12 and Atlantic 10.
Atlantic One - Heavy metal song written by Kyle in tribute to Atlantic 14 tourney champion. Lifetime Basketball State subscription to anybody who records a full version.
Lyrics:
You are the Atlantic One, number two to none
You are the champion
You are the Atlantic One, your foes undone
You are the destroyer
Thirteen victims, they lay at your feet
A pile of bleached bones, 'cause you ate their meat
The taste of their blood was so fucking sweet
You are the Atlantic One!
You are the Atlantic One!
Bally - Official mascot of the site, a talking basketball. Discovered underneath the bench at a St. Francis (NY)-St. Francis (PA) game. Dreamer. Innovator. N.C. State graduate. Addicted to the Preseason NIT. Former spokesball for the Big XVI Conference. Mortal enemy of Footbally. Naked.
Basketball State - Subscription college basketball website full of stats and information constructed by Kyle, in his garage.
Bison Fever - Powerful feeling of excitement surrounding the 2008-09 North Dakota State Bison, winners of Badlands Conference title in their first year of NCAA eligibility.
Bizarro Valley - 2008-09 conference regular season in the Missouri Valley Conference. Two-month race that defied logic, explanation and punditification. Culminated in "Bizarch Madness" conference tourney in St. Louis.
Boubacar, The - Name of weekday roundup posts during Season 4. Derived from erstwhile Morgan State standout forward Boubacar Coly. Also a joyous exclamation after a fine play.
Brain Explosion Series - Annual slate of nonconference games between teams the Ivy and Patriot Leagues. Won 10-9 by Ivy League in 2008-09.
Crowne Plaza Indianapolis Airport - Hotel in Indianapolis that serves as the official headquarters of The Mid-Majority.
curds - Dairy product obtained by curdling milk with rennet or an edible acidic substance. Served in Utah State press room. Squeak in your mouth.
Done Ruthless - Nickname given to former Tennessee-Martin star Lester Hudson by Mid-Majority readers in February 2009. Nominated by reader Chris as an anagram of Mr. Hudson's name, accompanied by lovely poem, affixed by popular vote.
Football Independence Day - Third great holiday of the college basketball calendar (along with Selection Sunday and BracketBusters), occurring the Monday after the American-style football championship game. Hoops Nation also celebrates Football Independence Day (Observed), the day after the national championship of collegiate American-style football.
Footbally - Official anti-mascot of the site, a talking football. Only speaks in point spreads. Lothario. Banished to the void after the Super Bowl Party of Death. Lurking.
Form™, The - The Mid-Majority's magic feedback contraption, which accepts readers' typed messages and delivers them to Kyle, Damon and Bally. Patent pending. Located here.
Hoops Nation - Allegorical country-within-a-country located in the United States of America. Collective of 251 college basketball programs and fan communities outside the eight top conferences. United in shared struggle for respect and common lack of appropriate finances to properly compete with Duke and Kansas. Capital located in Dayton, Ohio (2006-2009); Indianapolis (2009-present).
horchata - Delicious mixture of cinnamon, milk and rice. Spirit-nourishing blend, official drink of The Mid-Majority. Its intoxicating flavour haunts the soul. Difference between real Mexican restaurants and imposters.
Horchata Song, The - Song composed by Kyle in tribute to The Mid-Majority's official beverage. Written and performed while driving through California in February 2009. Lyrics first released on Twitter. Not to be confused with shitty Vampire Weekend song.
Lyrics:
Your hair is so red, like the cinnamon in horchata
Your skin is so pale, like the milk that is in horchata
Your legs are so nice, like long stems of rice,
An ingredient in my favorite drink.
My love for you, second only to... horchata.
Spanish lyrics:
Tu pelo es tan rojo como la canela... horchata
Tu piel es tan blanca como la leche... horchata
Tus piernas son buenas como tallos de arroz,
Un ingrediente en mi bebida favorita.
Mi amor por ti, segundo lugar solamente... a la horchata.
How 'Bout™ - Daily feature of The Boubacar during Season 4, a series of "quick hits" about various mid-major teams. Typical entry: "How 'Bout™ those Golden Badlands badasses of Oral Roberts, who play for a school where you can't say the word 'badass?'"
K-Dub's Krazy Fact of the Day - Regular feature of Kyle's ESPN Insider blog during the 2005-06 season, which moved to The Mid-Majority in Season 4. Consisted of a series of useless, trivial, meaningless items from the Basketball State database. Replaced by the U'useless Stat of the Day in Season 5.
Killswitch - Kyle's secret heavy metal nickname. Derived from habit of listening to Nordic deathcore to stay awake while driving late at night.
Mid-Merchandise Store - Low-margin Cafepress store where readers can buy t-shirts, hoodies, bibs, mugs and hats. No thongs.
Monsterizer - Nickname for current Butler forward Matt Howard. Occasionally resembles both Igor and Frankenstein when he takes it to the hoop.
National Pixelvision Day - February 3. A day to watch 360p video feeds of mid-major college basketball with your friends, and for posting 140-character responses using Twitter hashtag #pixelvision. A wild success in its inaugural year. Tom Petty performed live at the 2010 NPD halftime show.
Other 24 (22), The - Division I conferences below the Red Line. Basis for weekly "The State" rankings. Noted as "The Other 22 1/2" during Season 4, and mistakenly rounded down during Season 5. The "half" was the Atlantic 14 Conference, which during Season 4 was the only league that for one Red Line criteria (average athletic budget under $20 million) and not the other (average basketball budget under $2 million). This rounding error has been corrected in Season 6, and the addition of the Great West has increased the number to 24.
Play-In Game - Correct title for the 64/65 NCAA Tournament game played in Dayton, Ohio. Also known as the Notorious P.I.G. and the Most Honest Game in College Basketball (© Steve Timble). Badge of honor.
Red Line, The - A financial line that separates the richest eight conferences and "The Other 24." In each of the top eight (ACC, SEC, Pac-10, Big Ten, Big East, Big XII, Mountain West and Conference USA), schools average over $20 million in overall athletic budget and spend an average $2 million on men's basketball. The Atlantic 14 and Missouri Valley, the "straddlers," spend more than $2M on hoops, but average less than $20M in overall expenses. A longer explanation can be found here.
Season 2 - The 2005-06 college basketball season. Notable for George Mason's run to the Final Four.
Season 3 - The 2006-07 college basketball season. Notable for Sweet 16 runs by Southern Illinois and Butler.
Season 4 - The 2007-08 college basketball season. The site's most successful and consistent campaign to date. Notable for Davidson's Elite Eight appearance.
Season 5 - The 2008-09 college basketball season. Memorialized in Sports Bubble Blues. Cleveland State, Siena, Dayton and Western Kentucky won NCAA first-round games, and Xavier made the Elite Eight.
Season 6 - The 2009-10 college basketball season. You are here.
Spankmaster - Nickname for dynamic Butler forward Gordon Hayward, who had an outstanding freshman season in 2008-09. Because there's a new kind of hero on the streets.
Sports Bubble Stadium - Nickname for Lucas Oil Stadium in Indianapolis, the site of the 2010 Final Four. Suffers from an extreme acreage-to-usefulness deficit.
Sports Bubble, The - Speculative, irrational 21st Century phenomenon involving inflated prices, salaries and asset values in the sports industry. Also the title ofan essay that got Kyle fired from ESPN.com.
Title R - Pending NCAA regulation that each Division I schools must have at least one cheerleader or dance team member with red hair. Punishable by relegation to Division IV.
Top Five Tuesday - Former feature of Kyle's ESPN Insider blog during 2005-06. Moved to TMM for Season 3. Consisted of five easy pieces, loosely joined. [ref]
Tourney Central - Fourteen-day series during Championship Fortnight containing game recaps, previews, updated brackets and links to boxscores for conference tourneys below the Red Line. See: 2008, 2009.
Travelogue, The - Eighteen-part travel-themed series from Season 4. Two lost chapters.
Ultra-Violence Mechanism (UVM) - Nickname for the 2004-05 University of Vermont Catamounts team that beat Syracuse in the NCAA's first round. Metaphorical heavy metal band led by Taylor Coppenrath, known for hits "Pain Factory," "Midnight At The Vomit Arcade," and "Catatonic Entombment."
UMPFN - Acronym for "Unnamed Major Program From The Northwest," or Gonzaga. Used starting in Season 1 and through Season 3. Term used to convey separate-but-equal status of a program that spends like a mid-major but wins like an ACC school. UMPFN was one of those gags we did back in the day to generate "conversation" and sell t-shirts. Deep down, we love Gonzaga.
Upset Club - Defunct site feature from Seasons 4 and 5. Readers could sign up to receive notification of Red Line Upsets by e-mail or text. Rendered obsolete by Twitter.
Urge, The - Powerful motivation and compulsion by coaches and administrators to compromise integrity to make the NCAA Tournament.
Whelliston, Ace - Kyle's 1940's sportswriter alter ego, who covered Ivy League games in 2005. Possibly senile and/or dangerous.
Wolfie Seawolf - Stony Brook mascot responsible for applying clothesline tackle on NCAA mascot J.J. Jumper during 2005 America East quarterfinals. Hero.
Worst Pizza Ever Made, The - Legendary pizza served at the University of Delaware's press room on 12/30/2005. Included a crust like sawdust and cheese like candle wax.
7 Basic Facts You Should Know About The Mid-Majority
- "Mid-major" has nothing to do with winning and losing. Sic transit gloria; this is about money. TMM covers teams in conferences with average athletic budgets under $20 million (a/k/a the Red Line).
- We are fully funded by you, the viewers.
- Each season begins on November 1 with a week of essays ("Essay Season"), and ends when the last team below the Red Line has been eliminated from the NCAA Tournament.
- At the end of every season comes Kyle's epilogue. These are often very long.
- Kyle goes to a lot of college basketball games.
- Bally is a talking cartoon basketball who also travels all around the country in physical form with Kyle.
- Kyle doesn't do radio interviews.
Good Places to Get Started
Here are some entries that have been particularly popular with readers over the years: The Taylor Coppenrath Experience; 22 Teams That Can Beat The Hartford Hawks; Here's Where The Story Ends; The Worst Pizza Ever Made; The Beautiful Season; Me, The Internet and UC Irvine; Free Wolfie; The National Anthem; The Boubacar 2/6/2008 (Student Spirit Edition); The Mid-Majority Interview: Dolph Pulliam; Why You Shouldn't Enter Your Office Pool; Thank You; The Sports Bubble; Mock Selection 2009.The Glossary
1
100 Game Project, The - Season 1 quest to attend 100 college basketball games in a single season, originally conceived as a gimmick to raise website traffic. Completed successfully.A
All Caps Game - ANNUAL TRADITION BEGUN IN SEASON 6. ALL TWEETS REGARDING THE #ALLCAPSGAME MUST BE TYPED IN ALL CAPS, BECAUSE THE ACG IS VERY IMPORTANT. THE 2010 ALL CAPS GAME FEATURED LOYOLA (ILL.) AND UIC OF THE HORIZON LEAGUE.America's Most Boring Interstate - The long stretch of Interstate 70 from Salina, Kansas to Denver, Colorado. Nominee of reader Trae, and winner of our February 2009 contest.
American-Style Football - Bizarre combination of fake violence and boardroom procedurals; worst game ever invented. Designed specifically for confused, maladjusted, passive-aggressive sissies.
Arnone, Jasper Joe - Public address announcer for Central Connecticut State, and the finest at his job in all of Hoops Nation. Interview subject during Season 4. The Best.
ARRRGH - Expression of pain and anguish, often heard in March when a team below the Red Line comes close to a landmark upset but falls just short at the end. Always spelled with three R's. Subject of a worst-ARRRGH contest in December 2007, won by Dr. Pierce Greenberg with a story about UNC Wilmington 2003.
Atlantic 14 - Red Line-straddling league full of wonderful overachieving programs and proud fans. Financial issues limit teams' ability to retain salaried personnel. Includes 40 percent more teams than listed; truth in advertising is very important. Formerly known as the Atlantic 12 and Atlantic 10.
Atlantic One - Heavy metal song written by Kyle in tribute to Atlantic 14 tourney champion. Lifetime Basketball State subscription to anybody who records a full version.
Lyrics:
You are the Atlantic One, number two to none
You are the champion
You are the Atlantic One, your foes undone
You are the destroyer
Thirteen victims, they lay at your feet
A pile of bleached bones, 'cause you ate their meat
The taste of their blood was so fucking sweet
You are the Atlantic One!
You are the Atlantic One!
B
Badlands Conference - League formerly known as the Mid-Continent Conference. Rebranded in a tribute to a brewery, which is wrong, wrong, wrong because of the kids. Citizens of Hoops Nation offered the conference a better name, a tribute to its geographic footprint and bad-ass nature of the style of ball played in the league. Logo designed by reader Nate.Bally - Official mascot of the site, a talking basketball. Discovered underneath the bench at a St. Francis (NY)-St. Francis (PA) game. Dreamer. Innovator. N.C. State graduate. Addicted to the Preseason NIT. Former spokesball for the Big XVI Conference. Mortal enemy of Footbally. Naked.
Basketball State - Subscription college basketball website full of stats and information constructed by Kyle, in his garage.
Bison Fever - Powerful feeling of excitement surrounding the 2008-09 North Dakota State Bison, winners of Badlands Conference title in their first year of NCAA eligibility.
Bizarro Valley - 2008-09 conference regular season in the Missouri Valley Conference. Two-month race that defied logic, explanation and punditification. Culminated in "Bizarch Madness" conference tourney in St. Louis.
Boubacar, The - Name of weekday roundup posts during Season 4. Derived from erstwhile Morgan State standout forward Boubacar Coly. Also a joyous exclamation after a fine play.
Brain Explosion Series - Annual slate of nonconference games between teams the Ivy and Patriot Leagues. Won 10-9 by Ivy League in 2008-09.
C
Championship Fortnight - Thirteen days in March (occasionally beginning in late February) during which conference tourneys are contested. Typically begins on Tuesday with the Big South and Horizon League opening rounds. Continues through the subsequent weekend when ESPN finally takes notice. Concludes on Selection Sunday with the Southland final. Best two weeks of the year.Crowne Plaza Indianapolis Airport - Hotel in Indianapolis that serves as the official headquarters of The Mid-Majority.
curds - Dairy product obtained by curdling milk with rennet or an edible acidic substance. Served in Utah State press room. Squeak in your mouth.
D
Daily Paragraph, The - Weekday posts during Season 3. Inspired by Andy Katz' "Daily Word," but much longer. [ref]Done Ruthless - Nickname given to former Tennessee-Martin star Lester Hudson by Mid-Majority readers in February 2009. Nominated by reader Chris as an anagram of Mr. Hudson's name, accompanied by lovely poem, affixed by popular vote.
E
Epilogue, The - Annual essay series, each posted at the end of the small-college basketball season, defined as when the last sub-Red Line team is eliminated from the NCAA Tournament. The Difference Between Us and Them (Season 1), Epilogue: The Second (Season 2), Matters of Life and Death (Season 3), Fearlessness and Failure (Season 4), Who Cares Least (Season 5).F
Flash - Commissioned video of Stephen Curry highlights to Queen's 1980 hit "Flash". Video by Tim Burke. Inspired by a entry by Alan Hyder in a December 2008 superhero mashup contest.Football Independence Day - Third great holiday of the college basketball calendar (along with Selection Sunday and BracketBusters), occurring the Monday after the American-style football championship game. Hoops Nation also celebrates Football Independence Day (Observed), the day after the national championship of collegiate American-style football.
Footbally - Official anti-mascot of the site, a talking football. Only speaks in point spreads. Lothario. Banished to the void after the Super Bowl Party of Death. Lurking.
Form™, The - The Mid-Majority's magic feedback contraption, which accepts readers' typed messages and delivers them to Kyle, Damon and Bally. Patent pending. Located here.
G
Gay Chubby Dating - Refers to November 2008 incident when Google Ads served 468x60 banners for a dating service for large homosexual men. A field day for The Mid-Majority's critics. Last Google Ad ever shown on this site.H
Hodge, Julius - Former N.C. State star. Not a mid-major player, but this site's first cartoon superstar after a bad shooting night during Season 1. Recipient of late-season apology. Showed up later.Hoops Nation - Allegorical country-within-a-country located in the United States of America. Collective of 251 college basketball programs and fan communities outside the eight top conferences. United in shared struggle for respect and common lack of appropriate finances to properly compete with Duke and Kansas. Capital located in Dayton, Ohio (2006-2009); Indianapolis (2009-present).
horchata - Delicious mixture of cinnamon, milk and rice. Spirit-nourishing blend, official drink of The Mid-Majority. Its intoxicating flavour haunts the soul. Difference between real Mexican restaurants and imposters.
Horchata Song, The - Song composed by Kyle in tribute to The Mid-Majority's official beverage. Written and performed while driving through California in February 2009. Lyrics first released on Twitter. Not to be confused with shitty Vampire Weekend song.
Lyrics:
Your hair is so red, like the cinnamon in horchata
Your skin is so pale, like the milk that is in horchata
Your legs are so nice, like long stems of rice,
An ingredient in my favorite drink.
My love for you, second only to... horchata.
Spanish lyrics:
Tu pelo es tan rojo como la canela... horchata
Tu piel es tan blanca como la leche... horchata
Tus piernas son buenas como tallos de arroz,
Un ingrediente en mi bebida favorita.
Mi amor por ti, segundo lugar solamente... a la horchata.
How 'Bout™ - Daily feature of The Boubacar during Season 4, a series of "quick hits" about various mid-major teams. Typical entry: "How 'Bout™ those Golden Badlands badasses of Oral Roberts, who play for a school where you can't say the word 'badass?'"
J
J.J. Jumper - Terrifying frog/freak mascot designed by NCAA to represent the spirit of college basketball. Purveyor of stale time-out entertainment such as broken-boombox gags and "Basketball Survivor." Known to grind furry green crotch against the legs of beautiful, frightened MAAC cheerleaders. Destroyer of worlds. Bearer of filth. A mortal insult to endeavor.K
K-Dub - Kyle's nickname during his four years of writing and chatting at ESPN.com.K-Dub's Krazy Fact of the Day - Regular feature of Kyle's ESPN Insider blog during the 2005-06 season, which moved to The Mid-Majority in Season 4. Consisted of a series of useless, trivial, meaningless items from the Basketball State database. Replaced by the U'useless Stat of the Day in Season 5.
Killswitch - Kyle's secret heavy metal nickname. Derived from habit of listening to Nordic deathcore to stay awake while driving late at night.
L
Last Man in America to Know Who Won the Super Bowl, The - Annual fun party game played by Kyle since the mid-1980's. Made public during Season 4. Object is to go as long as possible without learning the winner or score of the American-style Football championship game. Season 4: Went down at the hands of the Valpo student section on Tuesday. Season 5: Lasted only 15 hours, 52 minutes.M
Mid-Majority Baller of the Week (MMBOW) - Weekly player award given during the regular season. Dates back to Season 1, and stands as one of the oldest Mid-Majority traditions. Winners are generally chosen for their ability to put in two or more great performances during the previous week.Mid-Merchandise Store - Low-margin Cafepress store where readers can buy t-shirts, hoodies, bibs, mugs and hats. No thongs.
Monsterizer - Nickname for current Butler forward Matt Howard. Occasionally resembles both Igor and Frankenstein when he takes it to the hoop.
N
National Anthem, The - "Rock and Roll, Part 2" by Gary Glitter.National Pixelvision Day - February 3. A day to watch 360p video feeds of mid-major college basketball with your friends, and for posting 140-character responses using Twitter hashtag #pixelvision. A wild success in its inaugural year. Tom Petty performed live at the 2010 NPD halftime show.
O
Official Wife Of The Mid-Majority, The - Married 2004, divorced 2009.Other 24 (22), The - Division I conferences below the Red Line. Basis for weekly "The State" rankings. Noted as "The Other 22 1/2" during Season 4, and mistakenly rounded down during Season 5. The "half" was the Atlantic 14 Conference, which during Season 4 was the only league that for one Red Line criteria (average athletic budget under $20 million) and not the other (average basketball budget under $2 million). This rounding error has been corrected in Season 6, and the addition of the Great West has increased the number to 24.
P
Petty, Tom - Unofficial poet laureate of Hoops Nation. Singer of songs about struggle and yearning and losing, about overcoming obstacles and odds. Recurring subject during 2009 BracketBusters marathon chat. Object of tribute contest in February 2009.Play-In Game - Correct title for the 64/65 NCAA Tournament game played in Dayton, Ohio. Also known as the Notorious P.I.G. and the Most Honest Game in College Basketball (© Steve Timble). Badge of honor.
R
Red Line Upset - Occurs when a team in a conference below the Red Line beats a team in a league above it. In 2008-09, teams below the Red Line beat teams above only 13.4 percent of the time. Our exceptions to this calculation are Gonzaga (whose results are removed from consideration) and the two "straddler" conferences, the Missouri Valley and Atlantic 14 (whose wins are only counted as RLU's when they beat teams from the biggest six "BCS" conferences). Even if you were to take out the exceptions, however, the percentages remain virtually the same.Red Line, The - A financial line that separates the richest eight conferences and "The Other 24." In each of the top eight (ACC, SEC, Pac-10, Big Ten, Big East, Big XII, Mountain West and Conference USA), schools average over $20 million in overall athletic budget and spend an average $2 million on men's basketball. The Atlantic 14 and Missouri Valley, the "straddlers," spend more than $2M on hoops, but average less than $20M in overall expenses. A longer explanation can be found here.
S
Season 1 - The 2004-05 college basketball season. Notable for the 100 Games Project and exciting first-round NCAA Tournament wins by Bucknell and Vermont.Season 2 - The 2005-06 college basketball season. Notable for George Mason's run to the Final Four.
Season 3 - The 2006-07 college basketball season. Notable for Sweet 16 runs by Southern Illinois and Butler.
Season 4 - The 2007-08 college basketball season. The site's most successful and consistent campaign to date. Notable for Davidson's Elite Eight appearance.
Season 5 - The 2008-09 college basketball season. Memorialized in Sports Bubble Blues. Cleveland State, Siena, Dayton and Western Kentucky won NCAA first-round games, and Xavier made the Elite Eight.
Season 6 - The 2009-10 college basketball season. You are here.
Spankmaster - Nickname for dynamic Butler forward Gordon Hayward, who had an outstanding freshman season in 2008-09. Because there's a new kind of hero on the streets.
Sports Bubble Stadium - Nickname for Lucas Oil Stadium in Indianapolis, the site of the 2010 Final Four. Suffers from an extreme acreage-to-usefulness deficit.
Sports Bubble, The - Speculative, irrational 21st Century phenomenon involving inflated prices, salaries and asset values in the sports industry. Also the title of
T
Title G - Possible future NCAA regulation that would require each Division I schools must have at least one cheerleader or dance team member with glasses. Still in committee.Title R - Pending NCAA regulation that each Division I schools must have at least one cheerleader or dance team member with red hair. Punishable by relegation to Division IV.
Top Five Tuesday - Former feature of Kyle's ESPN Insider blog during 2005-06. Moved to TMM for Season 3. Consisted of five easy pieces, loosely joined. [ref]
Tourney Central - Fourteen-day series during Championship Fortnight containing game recaps, previews, updated brackets and links to boxscores for conference tourneys below the Red Line. See: 2008, 2009.
Travelogue, The - Eighteen-part travel-themed series from Season 4. Two lost chapters.
U
U'useless Stat of the Day - Named for Drake U'u, former Hartford Hawks player. During Season 5, we searched for a reason to repeat his name every day, and reader Alex suggested that we repurpose the "K-Dub's Krazy Fact of the Day" under his name. Originally the "U'useful Stat of the Day" as a tribute to Drake's small but important contributions to the team, but we finally realized that the stats were useless. On an unrelated note, U'u left the team after the season.Ultra-Violence Mechanism (UVM) - Nickname for the 2004-05 University of Vermont Catamounts team that beat Syracuse in the NCAA's first round. Metaphorical heavy metal band led by Taylor Coppenrath, known for hits "Pain Factory," "Midnight At The Vomit Arcade," and "Catatonic Entombment."
UMPFN - Acronym for "Unnamed Major Program From The Northwest," or Gonzaga. Used starting in Season 1 and through Season 3. Term used to convey separate-but-equal status of a program that spends like a mid-major but wins like an ACC school. UMPFN was one of those gags we did back in the day to generate "conversation" and sell t-shirts. Deep down, we love Gonzaga.
Upset Club - Defunct site feature from Seasons 4 and 5. Readers could sign up to receive notification of Red Line Upsets by e-mail or text. Rendered obsolete by Twitter.
Urge, The - Powerful motivation and compulsion by coaches and administrators to compromise integrity to make the NCAA Tournament.
W
Waffle House - Chain restaurant with locations in the southern and midwestern parts of Hoops Nation, frequented by Kyle during his travels. Kyle recommends that you get your hashbrowns "smothered, covered, diced and peppered" (onions, cheese, tomatoes and jalapenos), and that you plug the jukebox with 15 consecutive plays of "There Are Raisins In My Toast" before you leave.Whelliston, Ace - Kyle's 1940's sportswriter alter ego, who covered Ivy League games in 2005. Possibly senile and/or dangerous.
Wolfie Seawolf - Stony Brook mascot responsible for applying clothesline tackle on NCAA mascot J.J. Jumper during 2005 America East quarterfinals. Hero.
Worst Pizza Ever Made, The - Legendary pizza served at the University of Delaware's press room on 12/30/2005. Included a crust like sawdust and cheese like candle wax.
